Sunday, 31 January 2010

Doggedly Trying

Last week I was utterly useless. Utterly. Useless. I sat in front of the computer and couldn’t even find the impetus to fill in my status bar on Facebook. It was something to do with the cold and sleet and the constant audio backdrop of radio news from Haiti; the sound of so much terror and pain.

After sitting like someone drugged I would get up and make coffee or walk in circles or stare with exasperation at the huge pile of filing growing exponentially next to my desk. Sometimes I even went outsdie and stood around glumly in the garden or cleaned the kitchen but writing wise I remained loggerheaded.


On Thursday, to try a new tactic, I went out with my brilliant buddy L and got totally smashed. I vaguely remember loudly debating positive psychology versus religion, the probabilities of meeting either a soul mate or a lunatic by on-line dating, buying double rounds of Dalwhinny whiskey on my debit card and talking in Zambian pigeon English to the poor taxi driver on the way home.
‘Kukamba Chinyanja my brother? I kept asking.
‘I’m from bloody Bangladesh,’ he kept telling me looking over his shoulder for support from my equally wasted buddy L who was gesticulating wildly in the back seat in a rant about small change.

The hangover on Friday was monstrous but that didn’t help kick start my writing again either. So much for Fitzgerald / Hunter Thompson School of Creative Writing.

Today thank goodness the rusty cogs started creakily turning but it is still like trying to squeeze the last of the hand cream out of a tube when your hands are already slippery.

Grace, having been banned from the park for an entire month due to her five weeks of near continuous free-running whilst on holiday, (guide dog trainers rules..not mine I promise) is not helping. Every few minutes she brings over a stinky soft toy and sticks it on my lap with eyes huge and solemn, in an effort to get me to play with her. A pile of half gnawed rubber rings, fluffy elephants, teddy bears and rope pulls has built up next to the filing. When I don’t respond she stands at the door and whimpers to be let out. Five minutes later she whimpers to be let in. The door to the garden is next to my desk and every time I open the door the temperature drops by several degrees forcing me to get up AGAIN and find extra socks, shawls, jumpers etc which sets off the cycle of coffee, washing up...
I end up barking at her (in a strange role reversal), ‘Not NOW I am TRYING to WORK!’
So today she is lying in her bed with eyes rolling, sighing dramatically and looking forlorn. All together now..’Its a dog’s life..!’

9 comments:

family affairs said...

Always worth trying the getting pissed approach though.....hope all OK with you and with your dad Lxxx - let me know. Sent you an email via gmail but not sure you got it - was ages ago and can you send message to my new blog address http://familyaffairsandothermatters.com please if you want to do it via comments Lx

Chimera said...

Will do L and apologies for not having been in touch sooner. have been thnking of you.
T xxx

The Bug said...

Wow - I only remember a handful of phrases from Nyanja. The one that comes to mine right now is "Iwe!" That could apply to either you or your dog LOL.

I'm glad you were able to write something that made me laugh out of the dregs of your writer's block. Because it's all about me, really. Heh.

Mud in the City said...

You did make me laugh about that poor taxi man! Hope the words start to flow....

Susan at Stony River said...

Aaawww, poor Grace and poor you -- but I would have loved to have joined in that taxi ride! ROFL Good luck getting some work down without breaking the dog's heart.
;-)

Miranda said...

agh man that Gracie is an expressive thing!

So are you actually, come to think of it!

I would sooo love a night on the town like that!
xxx

lodgeman said...

Lovely post!

オテモヤン said...

オナニー
逆援助
SEX
フェラチオ
ソープ
逆援助
出張ホスト
手コキ
おっぱい
フェラチオ
中出し
セックス
デリヘル
包茎
逆援
性欲

Chimera said...

Thanks Bug, Mud, Susan, Miranda, Richard,
Yes seems we can all relate to writer's block! Grrr and owch. Grace always inspirational tho'! I am lucky indeed. When in doubt observe the dog..
Tanvi xx