Fiary Tales

I am watching a squirrel watching a very black cat watching a very oblivious blackbird in my garden. The squirrel, whom I shall call Dennis although it’s not his real name, is a bit of a yob. He nicks everything on my bird table and I am sure I have seen him trying to break into my back door when he thinks I can’t see him.

My interview for the 6-month placement was at Canary Wharf.
I had put three alarm clocks strategically around the bedroom, which would ensure I had to actually get out of bed to turn them off. As it was I didn’t really sleep so at 5:30 I got up and blearily got tarted up. There is nothing more disgusting then putting on foundation and eye makeup early in the morning. It is just wrong and always makes me feel greasy and clown like.
Taxi was early, train was on time…Kings Cross underground was shut. Overcrowding or terrorism..not quite sure, so when I finally got to Canary Wharf I was a bit worse for wear and in a hurry. The problem is Canary Wharf is a mother of a glass building. This is not good for VI people as it is hard to tell which door is door and which is not. For several minutes I bounced into glass like a very large and squidgy moth. And then… a voice,

Knight: Fair..ish maiden. I see thou art lost and wandering strangely. Couldst I be of service?

I: Why thou couldst gentle knight. Wouldst thou unpeel me from this glass and show me the way to this castle of glass in the sky.(shows him parchment upon wherein is written the quest.)

Knight: Alas, I see to get to yon castle thou must traverse a most worrisome and hellish route through….The Barclays Building.

I: My God. The Barclays Building?? Yet though I am much affrighted and fearful I must go on for I have made an oath.

Knight Why then fair..ish ermm maid I shall guide and protect you through these corridors of mirrors.

(And together they leapt over Xmas trees of fire and Star Bucks and the shop of the Futon and rounded the corner and saw the terrible rays glinting from the Barclays Building.)

Knight: I can go no further for I weaken terribly but from here you should be safe. Don’t look back and remember thou must never speak of me.

I: But gallant Knight I need know your name…your telephone number at leastest.

Knight. No it can never be….for I work ..(and here he disappeared into the mist.) work for HSBC.

This really happened I kid you not and would I lie?

Interview was a bit of a shambles but the adventure was worth it! Even got back in time to present my HIV documentary ‘On the Frontline’ at Cambridge City Council as part of their Disability and HIV International days. (They got two for one for cheap with me.)
Happy Disability Week and don’t forget World HIV Day on 1st December. Go on and give a few quid (Oxfam, Project San Francisco etc or local charity) and talk to someone about it all. It is important and whereas it may be no skin off your nose it might possibly save the skin of someone else! Awww go on go on go on!